The Stress Nanny with Lindsay Miller
Mindfulness and stress management for families raising kids with big goals, big feelings, and everything in between.
Hosted by mindfulness coach Lindsay Miller, The Stress Nanny is full of practical strategies for calming anxious kids, supporting high-achievers, and teaching emotional regulation in everyday moments. Each episode offers easy-to-use mindfulness practices, stress management tips, and confidence-building tools that empower kids (and parents!) to navigate challenges with ease. Whether you’re raising a child who struggles with big feelings, a high-performing student-athlete, or simply want a calmer home, The Stress Nanny will give you the resources and encouragement you need.
The Stress Nanny with Lindsay Miller
Ep 188 From Survival to Significance: Victoria Rader on Courage, Kaizen, and Quantum Leaps
What if the fastest way to move forward isn’t a grand reinvention, but one small promise kept today? That’s the heartbeat of this conversation with possibility coach and author Victoria Rader, PhD—a practical, grace-filled path from survival to significance that starts with a better question and a tiny step.
We start with Victoria’s unlikely origin story: a joyful family trip that quietly became debt, a Google search for flexible income, and a shy newcomer who stumbled into real estate during a recession—and still rose to the top 1% through simple daily actions. From there, we unpack the knowing–doing gap and the inner commitment we make each day: scared or sacred. You’ll learn how to shift “Why is this happening?” to “How can I use this?” so your subconscious starts working for you, not against you. Victoria’s electricity metaphor reframes resistance as a former protector, not an enemy, and shows how lowering internal resistance lets more light—and abundance—through.
We dig into her four S’s framework—Survival, Stability, Success, Significance—and how to climb it with the right next step: install one non-negotiable habit, then upgrade your mindset, then widen your heart to serve. Victoria demystifies “quantum leaps,” grounding them in physics: steady, boring movement meets a spark of light that carries you higher. We also talk courage and discouragement, why overthinking is a sign the heart’s offline, and how “forgive me” repairs relationships without shame. Parents and leaders alike will find tools to model emotional regulation, resilience, and self-trust—plus a fresh language that kids can use to turn anxiety into action.
If you’re ready to close the gap between what you know and what you do, this is your map: ask better questions, honor tiny wins, expose yourself to light, and keep moving. Subscribe, share with a friend who needs calm and courage, and leave a review to help more families find these tools. Then tell us: what’s your one non-negotiable habit this week?
To connect with Victoria and learn more about her work click here.
Lindsay Miller is a distinguished kids mindfulness coach, mindfulness educator and host of The Stress Nanny Podcast. She is known for her suitcase tricks and playful laugh. When she's not cheering on her daughter or rollerblading on local trails with her husband, you can find her using her 20+ years of child development study and mindfulness certification to dream up new ways to get kids excited about deep breathing. Having been featured on numerous podcasts, platforms and publications, Lindsay’s words of wisdom are high impact and leave a lasting impression wherever she goes.
To sign up for Lindsay's "Calm & Collected" Newsletter click here.
To review the podcast click here.
Welcome to the Stress Nanny, the podcast where we take the overwhelm out of parenting and help kids and parents build calm, confidence, and connection. I'm your host, Lindsay Miller, Kids Mindfulness Coach and Cheerleader for busy families everywhere. Each week we'll explore simple tools, uplifting stories, and practical strategies to help your child learn emotional regulation, resilience, and self-confidence, while giving you a little more peace of mind too. I'm so glad you're here. My guest today is Victoria Rader, PhD. She's the possibility coach and founder of U2 Shine. Victoria is a globally recognized transformational speaker featured in Forbes and seen on CNN, Fox, ABC, and NBC. A pioneer of quantum personal development, Victoria created innovative tools like mygiftoffer.com, ME Journals, Empower Me, and Master Me apps. A multiple times best-selling award-winning author, she's also featured in the Zero Limits movie. Her work frees individuals toward fulfillment and prosperity. Her teachings have reached even the moon through the Lunar Legacy Project. Victoria's mission is to help others to quantum leap their life by remembering and shining their light through love. And she represents that with life originating vibrant emotion. An avid reader, traveler, tennis player, and a dog lover, Victoria's greatest joy in life is her family. Above all, Victoria is clear that all that has been accomplished by her has simply been accomplished through her via God's infinite divine grace. Victoria, thank you so much for joining me today.
SPEAKER_01:Thank you so much, Lindsay. I'm looking forward to our conversation.
SPEAKER_00:I am too. So I first just want to hear from your perspective how you got into this work. I mean, what you've built and the way that you help people, it's really incredible. And I know we kind of can start out with aspirations, but we build them a little at a time. So help us understand how you got to where you are now.
SPEAKER_01:You know, I think with this as with everything, there's so many starting points. I'm a big believer that when we cross this mortal veil, we will look back and we'll say, oh, it all makes sense. And it all started the moment I was born. You know, I think we will all have that crisp clarity because all of a sudden you go like, oh yeah, oh yeah, oh yeah. And so I just wanted to share a couple, oh yes, you know, that makes sense. One of them was I was born in Ukraine, and when I came to the United States, I came with a very different financial mindset. Back home, we did not have a credit card. You spent only the money you had, and you had a debit card attached to your account. And so when I came first to the US, got married, had my two children, I decided it was a great idea to take them to Greece to start homeschooling them and to show them the antique world. So when we went to Greece, we had amazing three weeks. I came home and my husband set me down and he said, now, honey, just so that you know, the little plastic you were swiping, there's nothing attached to it. You put us into debt. And I was like, What? There's no money, you can actually buy stuff with no money. I mean, you know, the idea. I know it sounds stupid, right? But I'm just saying it's like, you mean you can actually buy stuff with? I mean, I just had this catch 22, you know, like, okay, okay, we're not rich. You know, I now know we're not rich. Okay, this is good to know. This is 2006-07. So when the real estate in the United States is the homes are flying off shelves like cupcakes, predatory lending, which I didn't know what it was, didn't know anything about it. But I go online and I put in what's the fastest way to make money in America while staying home with children. I actually put that into Google. Um the all-loving, all-known-knowing Google says real estate. And without two things happening, without thinking, I know that I won't sacrifice what I've seen that it did for my kids. I now know what adventure tastes like. So I have a why that is palpable. And I said, I'm gonna do whatever it takes to provide my kids with that because it's not a theory, it's a real life experience. I get into real estate, I'm naturally a very shy person. So the first year I just sob. I sob every night, you know, complete discomfort of talking to people, sales. But I remember while I'm crying, right? Long story short, within a year and a half, the recession hits within the first year real estate. And within a year and a half, just by doing consistent, very simple, very small steps every day, I become top 1% of the agents in the country. And all of a sudden, everybody wants to know my secret. And it's a very boring secret, which is do these five things every day, and nobody wants to hear it. But then I ask the next question, I said, wait a minute, why is it that I do them? And people who are more capable than me have more experience than me, some of them much smarter than me, some of them much more service-oriented than me, people that have better qualifications in different areas of my life are not doing these things. And asking that question got me on the journey of what Bob Proctor called knowing, doing gap. It's how do you close the gap between knowing what you've got to be doing and actually doing it so you can see the results? That threw me into understanding the subconscious mind. I got the PhD in metaphysics, and this is where gotcha, something makes sense, came in. I realized that as a kid, I was a very psychic kid. I could feel people's energy, I could tune into people's energy, and now I realized, oh my gosh, I've had this unfair advantage of tuning into the outcome prior to the outcome, pursuing things that will work, letting go things that don't work, and there isn't a practical way to teach it without expanding your spiritual capacity. So that's the practical response as to how U2 Shine was born as a company where we teach you how to know who you are spiritually, how to shift your energy and your subconscious mind so that you can take practical steps and have more peace, purpose, passion, and prosperity. My favorite piece.
SPEAKER_00:Yes. And we're gonna get into those, which I love, because I think one of the things that is striking to me about your story is that it was kind of a treasure hunt, it sounds like. I mean, you didn't start out with all those pieces, right? You knew you had that meaning, like you said, the why. You're like, I want to give my kids adventure. I want them to have a broad perspective of the world and understand the global mindset. And I got to figure out how to get there. And then as you were going, you picked up, you know, like you said, the awareness and you were able to tune into your gifts in a different way. And then that adding on a piece at a time was how you came to where you are today. I love that.
SPEAKER_01:I love the definition treasure hunt because I think that's what this life is, right? And I think we put all of our efforts either burying our treasure or digging it out. I think that's the two processes. So I loved how you define it.
SPEAKER_00:Talk to me more about that. What do you see? How do you see people burying it?
SPEAKER_01:I think the greatest fear that we carry, it comes from the Course of Miracles. You know, I actually did a 52 video program on a Course of Miracles after I read Marian Williamson's take on it. And she was the one that took the Course of Miracles and the phrase in it that said, it is not our darkness that we fear, it is our light. And I was just like, wait a minute, wait a minute. It is so true. Because if I discover the light that I am, I'll have to do something about it. And isn't it so much safer to stay within the wound that I am? And is it so much safer to go down the self-pity path? Because that's the only way I've known how to receive attention. And so every day I believe we're sitting, like making two choices. I call them the choice between scared and sacred. Every day, every one of us has these two voices in our mind. One voice says, Don't do it, don't rock the boat, survive. And the other voice says, Go for it. And every moment of every day, we're either choosing the scared part or the sacred part. You know, and the language came from a client of mine came to me and said, I cannot commit. She goes, I cannot commit. I either overcommit or undercommit. And I went to start telling her, these are the ways to be committed, you know, because I'm a persistent junkie. I'm like, oh, rhino, you know, I'm a rhino. And all of a sudden the spirit is like, no, no, no, everybody's incredibly committed. You're like, what? Yeah, everybody's incredibly committed. We're either committed to our scared self and we'll sacrifice everything because we're so committed, or we're committed to our sacred self. So it's the life of shifting the commitment. And I love the treasure hunt. It's going like, am I burying or am I digging? Am I burying or am I digging? And I believe, in a practical sense, because I love the practicality of it, it's the questions that we ask internally. Once you start listening to the questions you ask internally, you immediately know whether you're burying the light that you are, so that nobody can hurt it, want anything from it, or whether you're pursuing it.
SPEAKER_00:Oh my gosh. I love that. I love the idea of monitoring your internal questions with an eye toward the sacred. That seems so poignant and beautiful because I agree that in the moments when life invites us, as you shared earlier, like the invitation you got, okay, you can say, Well, there's nothing I can do about this. I guess my kids won't see what I know that is possible for them. I'll just give up on that. Or like instead, your dialogue, your dialogue wasn't like, why me? Why did this happen to me? Why couldn't I have more access, you know, to travel for them? Your act, your dialogue was how can I make this happen? I know it's important.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, yeah, you know, and uh here's a secret preview. You know, I'm preparing a TED talk, and in that TED talk, I actually give the power shifts of questions, and you've just summarized it so succinctly. So when you hear yourself say, Why, right? Why not? Why can't I just shift it to how to? That really is the first shift because it's so easy to hear it. When you say, Oh my gosh, that's so unfair. How could it happen? Not that how, you know, why was it so unfair? When you hear that, just understand you're committing to the scared, and your subconscious will answer that and you'll bury it deeper. So say, okay, I felt that was unfair. How was it unfair in a way that is advantageous to me? It is huge. How was this situation that I believe is harming? How was it to teach me? How was it to benefit me? Because a part of it truly was, and it's a very vulnerable conversation. But if you would like to have the life of fulfillment, it's a conversation to be had.
SPEAKER_00:Well put. Yeah, well, and I love with your company the you to shine and you know, light me up. It's the idea being at each juncture, right? We're trying to make the choice to uncover that light a little bit more, to let that light shine, to let the light that we are as individuals grow brighter in this world.
SPEAKER_01:You know, I had what comes to mind because I channel so much information, the story I share often, but in different contexts, and that is I was about five and I was at home with my grandpa. My grandpa in Ukraine was watching me, my dad's dad, and I was a very creative child. And so I wanted to create a hanger for my doll's dress. I took the doll's dress off and I was going to hang it somewhere, and I looked around and saw the electrical socket. So I pulled the metal pin out of my hair. I opened it nicely and I plugged it in because it would have made a perfect hanger, right?
SPEAKER_00:It was resourceful for sure.
SPEAKER_01:It was resourceful, right? Oh, oh girl, you're so intuitive because resourceful is reconnecting to the source. We're gonna stay with that word of resourceful right there, right there. So I plug in into the source of power. Gratefully, I don't get electrocuted because the fuses blow. The fuses blow and the resistance saves me. That is such a powerful lesson because resistance inside us is there to save us. It has saved us before. So when you have electricity coming to the house, all of the devices have the same input. Your refrigerator, your light bulbs, all the devices have the same input. But the output, the amount of light that they're letting out is defined by resistance inside the device. So a little 15-watt light bulb is so dim inside the fridge, but a 100-watt light bulb is so bright in your living room. So you go, okay, you and I are connected to the source. We're literally resourced by the source of light, and the resistance we put to that flow will define how much light we're putting out, and as a result, how much abundance, true, genuine abundance of love, relationships, but also financial abundance to support love and relationships we receive. So then you say, What is the resistance in me? And that's where the genetic drama, trauma, unworthiness, subconscious beliefs, all of that is that block that brings the power down.
SPEAKER_00:Oh my gosh. Metaphor, you're speaking my language because on this podcast I love metaphors. So I'm gonna be sitting with that one for a while. It's a beautiful, it's so beautiful.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, so resource, resource, resource. We all have the same source, we define it differently. I say God, create a world designer. You know, however you define the source of all love, all light, and you we are resourced through it.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah. Okay, and then uh the idea of resistance being in service. I love that on so many levels because, like you said, so often when we do have a sense of resistance around something, it was a protective thought or instinct or pattern at one time. And so it was in our service, like your story where you stuck the bobby pin into the outlet, like it served, you know? And so when it serves, we tend to keep those things around because we might need them again later. But recognizing it as such, like, is this making me brighter? Is this making me shine? Was this something that's actually allowing more light to flow through me, or is it something that's dimming my light? And then using that as kind of your benchmark for making a choice forward.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, it's beautiful, you know, and also there is a continual, continual, continual improvement of the current paradigms and problems. I have this example that is so cool. So every year we've gone to different beach homes. I've since manifested our own beach home. It's just life is good. The stuff works, okay. Life is good. But two years ago, we are at the beach house for a week with my family, and within that one week, we make three emergency room visits. First, my son, then my daughter, then my husband. Three different conditions, but every other day I'm taking somebody to emergency room. Now, as I'm observing this, he receives excellent service, we barely wait for anything, and the problem is resolved beautifully. So when there is a consistent repetition, you want to pause and say, which program in my life is replaying itself? It's a great question. So I'm like, oh, wait a minute. I have a subconscious program. I'm so grateful for great medical service. Now I know where that program is born. A year prior to that, my dad had a very invasive open heart surgery. And during that surgery, we've received the most magnificent medical care and medical service. Now, is it better to have a program doctors of phenomenal versus doctors of crooks that are looking to take advantage of me? Both are true, by the way. Both are true. That pharmaceuticals saves life and pharmaceuticals kills life. Both are true. Your truth will be the one you're choosing to believe. So if you are choosing there's great medical service, you will start receiving great medical service. But but that frequency of gratitude became so dominant in my energy that I've started creating patterns of delivery of great medical service. Once again, is it better than the program, all doctors suck, and seeing that replay in your life? Yes, it is. But I had to be like, oh my gosh, I'm the common denominator. And I've told everybody you won't believe the amazing medical service we got. You won't like over and over and over again. So I sit there and I say, okay, here's a million-dollar question. What is a better paradigm to be at a frequency of? And a better paradigm is I'm so grateful for my regenerating restorative health, for my immune system that is rebooting itself into complete wholeness and in the well-being. I'm so amazed that with every year I age chronologically, I'm stronger, more beautiful, more vibrant, biological, without need of excellent medical service. Okay, download, right? I'm gonna bring that as a download for everybody who wants it, who is into energy work. We're just gonna make this a sacred space of a download. Wow. So the point is right now, that's the highest frequency I'm at. I'm witnessing it, I'm amazed, and I'm sure that in a year or two there will be a better frequency and a better and a better and a better one, and continue improving and increase. And what's important, this is coming very strongly for us. What's important is to know each area of your life where you are and go to the next level. So, areas of your life, your health, your intimate relationships, your family, your friends, your career, your business, they're not one and the same. Your passion, your calling, your service, your money, all areas of your life. You look at each area and you say, which one of these four levels of well-being am I at? Am I at survival? Am I at acceptability? Am I at success? Am I at significance? Because spiritually, you might be at significance, financially, you might be at survival, and because you're financially at survival and spiritually at significance, you're insisting on trying to be in significance in your finances, and you're stuck, and you don't know why you're stuck, and you're stuck because just like thermometer, temperature needs to go in order after survival comes stability. So you go into each, every area of your life, and you say, Wow, let's see which questions I'm asking here, and what is the next level accessible question to me? If I'm single and I want a soulmate, I'm probably subconsciously asking, Why am I single? Why is my partner found somebody? Why can't I find the right person? What has happened to all the good people? Why are all the good people taken? That's a pre-survival question. So we're gonna shift it to what is the one quality that I have that is going to bring my soulmate into my life? Wow, what is the one quality that I have that is bringing the ideal soulmate in my life? That's stability, right? So hopefully that I feel I know it, that that will help somebody to get really unstuck today.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, I feel like that helped me get unstuck today. I love that. Well, and just the there were so many things that you said that were so powerful, but I love especially that idea of balance because I think that sometimes we can get frustrated, right? Because we can look at one facet of our life and say, I've got something figured out in this facet of my life, but perhaps having a hard time translating it into other areas. And so, again, that idea of noticing your questions. And then I love whenever I'm teaching mindfulness to kids, we're always working in what's called the zone of proximal development, right? Like that next baby step that they can achieve with some help. And so the idea of the next question makes so much sense to me. And I love it because I think if you can tether it to that system you've created where it's like stability or uh say the S's again.
SPEAKER_01:Survival, stability, success, significance. And I've learned it from three combining it from three different resources, which is Jim Rowan, Brian Bathini, and John Maxwell. They are bits of their input that all of a sudden made perfect sense for me.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, but I love the idea of using that as a framework for the question. Like if you're at one stage and you're just looking to go the next one instead of jumping all the way up to significance or instead of asking something that's on par with where we are now, looking to the next one and being able to access a different reality based on asking that question pertaining to the area we want to go.
SPEAKER_01:Sorry, I almost interrupted you, forgive me. And so, what is as a bridge to be clear about that? Because I think somebody would be asking, okay, how, you know, how do I know where I am? So from survival to stability is a change of habit. So the question will be what action can I take today to get me out of survival to stability? If my goal is to have fit and vibrant body, never to lose weight, because what we lose, we must find. None of us are ever gonna lose weight again because it's not ours, we're not losing it, right? We're gonna be in our vibrant, radiant body. We're just so excited to be restoring our vibrant, radiant body. That's our goal. And so, if my goal is to restore a vibrant body, and I say, right now, that vibrant body is 300 pounds and happier than it should be. Okay, we're gonna go to the extreme. I'm going to say I'm definitely in survival. So, what is the one habit? What is my one non-negotiable habit? And you do one little habit and you say, I'm gonna have seven glasses of water no matter what, just one. I'm gonna do seven glasses of water no matter what this week. That's from survival to stability. You do water first, and once you're doing water, you're gonna do next week. And now I'm going to do 500 steps no matter what. You cannot go at 300, 500 pounds and no water to 10,000 steps. You have no capacity yet within you to prove to yourself that it's possible for you. You want to have a small win so you can prove to yourself that a big win is possible. So you're gonna say seven glasses of water, and then the next habit, 500 steps, and then next habit, a thousand steps. So once you've gotten those habits, you go from survival, from stability to success, which is I think I'm doing it. I think I am doing it is a mindset shift. So from survival to stability, change of habits, from stability to success, change of mindset. There's so much talk of change of mindset right now, and it's important. I actually teach on six factors of mindset that have to be changed. But if you don't have a habit to tune in to Lindsay's podcast weekly and listen to it, you will not shift the mindset that her podcast gives you, right? So we don't think about it, but from survival to stability, it's a habit. So if you're in survival, if you're going through devastating divorce and you're barely surviving, you've got to ask yourself, what is the one action I can do that gets me to stability through this? And that action will be I'm gonna shower and put makeup on every day, no matter what. Right? So habit. And then mindset is from stability to success. And once you shift the into the success, and success is my finances support my dreams. That's definition of success. And we all have different dreams, and so for us, for some of us, finances very minimally can make us very happy. We shouldn't be looking at somebody who makes 40 million and spends 39 and a half, right? My finances support my dreams. I'm successful, and you know your dreams, you know, your finances, and then significance is a change of heart. And a change of heart is how do I serve relentlessly? And I gotta tell you, if you're devastated, it is virtually impossible to have that change of heart. So habits, mindset, heart-that's the scale for every area of your life.
SPEAKER_00:That was so beautiful. I could just listen to you talk about that all day long. I love the recognition that a little bit goes a long way. Because I think sometimes when we have conversations like this, if a listener is looking at you or they're looking at someone who's really made a strong container for their light, you know what I mean? Allowed it so fully. And they're like, that feels like such a far distance. Again, like reframing in those ways, but recognizing that at each juncture, a little more of your light is radiating, right? And we're we're uncovering the light with every one of those tiny steps, whether it is a literal step to get 500 steps a day, or whether it is the glass of water, a little more of you is coming alive and lighting up with every single one of those actions or thoughts or patterns that you're resetting.
SPEAKER_01:Absolutely. You know, it's actually a law. My most recent book is called Prosper Me, this 35 universal laws to make money work for you. And that is a law, it's a Kaizen Wei law. It's a Japanese system of Kaizen Wei, that the most prominent and permanent way to make a lasting change is with teeny tiny increments. And you know, in the chapter I write, which comes, it's very aligned, I think, with the energy. You have an amazing energy of you listeners, by the way. As I'm tuning in, it's very high frequency. People that have come to change the world, that I mean, really, truly, just you've created such sacred space as I'm feeling that energy, and it's a privilege to be here, it really is. So, you know, so for that audience, you know, for the spiritual junkie who will love this next comment is people talk about quantum leap. And what I found is that very few understand what it is. I mean, what's like with quantum leap? It's like you go to bed, a failure, you wake up, guru. Nope, that's not quantum leap, that's delusion. Okay, that is delusion. So let's look at what a quantum leap is on quantum physics, right? Because metaphysics, my degree is quantum physics and spirituality being married. So when you look at quantum leap, it comes from the concept of quantum physics of quantum jump. So in our atom, we have a proton. Know there's a nucleus which is a proton and neutron, and the electrons are flying around. We've all seen from chemistry that picture of a little electron flying around the proton, it flies around, okay? We now know it goes in a wave around, whatever. So it keeps moving around and around and around consistently, over and over and over and over again, until there's a moment in time when a spark of light, a photon, hits that system. And because the electron is in the movement, the light hits it on the movement and carries it to the next level almost instantaneously. So two things are mandatory to experience the quantum leap, that quote unquote overnight success, steady, boring, predictable movement of making the same steps over and over and over again while exposing yourself to higher and higher frequencies of light until there is a right enlighted thought, idea, a moment that hits your movement and propels you to a brand new level. So, whatever it is you're currently doing, you've got to keep doing it while seeking a higher frequency of light. It's very important.
SPEAKER_00:That's so beautiful. I think I've said that every time you stop talking. I mean, that's reality. You're not describing a metaphor, you're describing life, right? And that's the building block of life. And then translating that up into experience is such a powerful way to consider it, like maintaining action while exposing yourself to greater and greater amounts of light.
SPEAKER_01:That's it. That's the recipe for quantum leap. And you don't control when and how it happens, you only control the effort you put in to both continue with actions and opening yourself to light. And then when that moment happens and they continue happening in a most unpredictable way, that is the definition of a miracle. That is the definition of a miraculous life. You trust the process of miracle by putting your effort and yet trusting the divine.
SPEAKER_00:Yes. Yeah. And I really can appreciate how you know, in the process of seeking the light and seeking the action, that it can feel a little bit tiring or overwhelming, or you have to be a little patient sometimes, right? But I think that when you have enough experiences where the light lands while you're taking the action, you start to trust, right? In a different way. And you're like, I know it'll come if I continue. I don't know when or how, but I know it'll come somehow.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah. You know, the word that you said, discouragement, is just huge. Actually, you didn't say that I heard it. That's pretty cool. What you've described was the process of discouragement, right? And it's fascinating because I literally just did uh a small live on Instagram I felt so strongly. Because when you look at the word courage, it comes from Latin word core, which is corazon, which is heart. And so when you have courage, you're tuned in to what's in your heart or what your sacred self is. And when you're discouraged, it's because you've lost the connection with your heart and you're now stuck in your brain. And how do you know you're being discouraged is when you're overthinking. When you catch yourself in the pattern of overthinking, you are discouraging yourself because you disconnected yourself from your heart. I would much rather everyone, and I've lived it, go and make a mistake and recalculate versus being terrified of making a mistake and overthinking and grinding yourself into discouragement. You know, the creator cannot, the divine cannot move, cannot re redirect your path if you're not moving your feet. So it's much better to start walking in the wrong direction, hit a wall and turn around and start heading back, than it is sitting being terrified that you're gonna hit a wall. Because that is the discouragement, because you go, Oh my gosh, what if I do this and I'm wrong? So you'll find out you're wrong and you'll recalculate and you're gonna go the right way, right? So that paralyzing fear of overthinking is what prevents us from becoming courageous and blundering forward. You know, you've got to laugh at those blunders. When my son was about, I don't know, nine months, somewhere there, he would eat spaghetti with his hands, maybe 10 months. You know, he just started hard food and probably older, probably doesn't matter. You know, before you report me to child protective services, whatever the age for eating spaghetti is legit because it's been a while. He just turned 22 and graduated his college. So whatever the spaghetti approved age is, but anyway, he would eat it with his hands because he didn't know how to eat it with his pork yet, and he would put it on his head and then he would fall asleep, and he would, and I would just have these videos where he is covered with spaghetti and he's asleep. I just thought it was the cutest thing as a parent. I would just laugh. Well, I think it's important for us to realize that that's how we look like to the divine source from which we've come. We cover ourselves with spaghetti all day long, and there is no harsh judgment. There is like, aren't you cute? Let me clean you up, let me just clean you up and let me show you a better way. Once we accept that we are that accepted by our creator, we can start learning to love ourselves, laugh at our spaghetti, and move forward. Because there's not a day that I go, don't go like, oh girl, you outdid yourself. That one is really the winner, right? So yeah.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, that's such a powerful thought. And I agree wholeheartedly that like grace is what we're met with no matter what. Just that gentle grace. And that when we recognize it and then can start to offer it to ourselves, everything changes because in those moments when we would, like you said, create that disconnect. How could I have done that? That was so dumb. I can't believe like that happened. I don't know what I was thinking. I mean, all those thoughts, right? That is that disconnect from heart that you're describing. And that's such a powerful way to think of that word. I have never thought of it like that before, but it's true that when we get stuck in our heads, we lose that connection with our heart. And then as a result, we lose touch with the level of grace that we could be carried with, should we just allow ourselves to be.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, I think asking for anybody who's a parent who's listening, you know, I've homeschooled my kids, and I can tell you the greatest advice that I have is the sooner you tell your kids forgive me, the faster you will heal you and any relationship that needs to be healed. Because I've got secret, they already know you're not perfect, so you don't have to be upholding the image that they know you don't have. And so I just remember very vividly, you know, my kids are 25 and 22 right now, incredible human beings. But my daughter was about six or seven, and I was losing it, I was shrieking on top of my lungs over nothing at her. And all of a sudden I go, What am I doing? And I looked at her and I said, Please forgive me. This should not be happening. Mommy needs to put herself in a timeout. And I walked out of the room, I closed the door, and I'm like, dude, what in the world are you doing? You know? And then she came in and she said, Mommy, you're gonna be okay. And we just cry, right? You're gonna be okay, and so just whatever relationship you're in, just saying, not I'm sorry, because I'm sorry robs you of your light. There's nothing sorry about you. There's stuff you've done that did not deserve you, and that you will do that does not deserve you for the rest of your life. There's nothing sorry about you, but saying forgive me, you're saying give me another chance to remember the light that I am. Give me forgive me, and so who is it that person in your life right now? Just call them and say, Forgive me. I'm remembering who I am, I want to be that person. So, yeah, it's huge.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, yeah, there's so much to that, and again, expectations sometimes that we set on ourselves to be that person, whether it's with our kids or whether it's in our work or in relationship, and how if we can acknowledge, like you just said, there are going to be those moments as humans where our potential doesn't match our action, and so we can just own that, like you've done multiple times in the last couple of minutes, and sometimes it's a big deal, you know. Sometimes it's it's in a really big way, no matter who we are or where we are. But if we can just know from the outset, like as humans, those are gonna be your experiences. And then I love that translation of forgive me, like give me another opportunity to approach this like in a fuller light.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, over and over and over and over again. You know, when I say me, one of our sub brands, Little Am Big E, as a formula of who I am, who each one of us is. And so when I say I am me, in our app, empower-me, the empowerment of me is little am is my mortal matter that manifests materially. I'm sorry, I have to poop every day. Flashlight, I am so sorry. There's good, it is just gonna happen, okay? That's this mortal matter that's gonna happen, but I'm also eternal energy, the essence that expands. And so the journey of this life that's cared M and sacred E. So I surrender my mortal to my eternal, my matter to my energy, my manifesting to my expansive, and my material to my essential over and over and over a million times a day. And the only way I can do it is by accepting both and not denying myself. You know, we have heard, I think, one too many times that I'm not this physical body, and I say, Oh, yes, you are. Your higher self has chosen to slow the energy down so that it manifests as matter, so you can learn to love all the faults and frailties and shortcomings because that is the only way to master love. It's easy to love perfection. How much harder it is to love mistaken matter. That's what we've all chosen, and then we say we're not it. Yeah.
SPEAKER_00:The amount of love and power flying around this podcast, I can hardly even handle it. I'm just so grateful. I'm so grateful for this conversation that I just feel like you blew the roof off so many of these ideas. And I love the impact that you've brought today and what that will ripple out into our listeners. I mean, into my life for sure, but into our listeners and into the spaces where light will shine better and more fully and with more clarity as a result of your visit today.
SPEAKER_01:Thank you. It's been an honor and great joy for me.
SPEAKER_00:Thank you. Before we go, will you share more about your books, more about how people can connect with you, your app, your work? How can they learn more with you?
SPEAKER_01:The fastest way to get in touch is going to our website, which is yu number two shine.com, u2 shine.com. A fun, fun, fun thing we've created is a moneyquiz.me. When you go to moneyquiz.me, it's going to tell you driving emotion and which laws of abundance that driving emotion is being blocked by. So if you take the quiz, it's a funky, fun way to discover. Oh wow, I'm value-driven or I'm compassion driven, or I'm simplicity driven. So enjoy the quiz, moneyquiz.me. And the greatest gift, I believe, we have so many programs, services, but the greatest gift I'm called to share is our empower-me app. I believe it is the most profound way to be empowered daily. We're continually adding the depth to that. I would invite anybody to lean into it fully.
SPEAKER_00:Thank you. Thank you again for being here today. It was such a gift to talk with you, Victoria.
SPEAKER_01:You have created such sacred space. Oh my gosh, Lindsay. Seriously, seriously. Thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you. I don't think this is a goodbye. I'm pretty sure our paths will cross again. I hope so.
SPEAKER_00:Thanks for listening to The Stress Nanny. If you found today's episode helpful, be sure to share it with a friend who could use a little extra calm in their week. And if you have a minute, I'd love for you to leave a review. It helps other parents find the show and join us on this journey. For more tools and support, head over to www.thestressnanny.com. Remember, you don't have to do stress alone. Together, we can raise kids who know how to navigate life with confidence and ease. Until next time, take a deep breath and give yourselves some grace.